How to Truly Do SXSW Like a Local

It’s finally here. Maybe you’re one of the few who doesn’t have their entire SXSW schedule figured out to a T. But with a plethora of “picks” lists, who can you trust? There’s just so much to do! Don’t worry, we’ve got your back. We’ve reached out to some true locals for their SXSW plans and we’re ready to share them with the world. Whether you’re fresh off the plane or you’re just an apathetic Austinite, you’ll go SXSWild for these spring break activities (none of which require a badge or a wristband)! Those who need to keep busy should consult The Straight-Laced. Heeding the call to adventure? Ask The Wanderers. If introverted hedonism describes your life, look to The Dwellers. The Experts will cover everything else.

DISCLAIMER: All quotes are REAL Austinite reactions to SXSW.

So…what will you be doing for SXSW?

The Straight-Laced

“Working 9-5 Monday through Friday. Avoiding downtown.”

“Working at a Spring Break camp.”

“Studying for midterms. Shadowing nurses.”

“Working on my thesis draft.”

“Working my tits off. Avoiding anything south of MLK. Taking a pair of scissors to an old trusty pair of jeans and wearing cut-offs. I got a new tattoo that needs some struttin’ around.” (SEE ARTICLE PHOTO)

The Wanderers

“Hopping on a plane and spending a week in Seattle. Retreating to the wilderness.”

“Going to San Francisco.”

“Camping at Enchanted Rock.”

The Dwellers

“Renting out my roommates’ bedrooms.”

“Sitting at home drinking beer and playing the best free solitaire I can find, or other computer games.”

“Staying as far the %*@! away as possible. I don’t care about smelling Alt J’s sweat or Sandra Bullock’s hair.”

The Experts

“It has a choo choo train!”

Of course, the younger generations know about all the hip things that usually fly under our radar. We asked a five-year-old elementary school student (clearly belonging to ‘Generation Hashtag Z’) who seemed to be in the know. And while we’re not entirely sure what this “choo choo” refers to, we’re certain it’s among the some of the more unofficial SX activities to check out. We were also fortunate enough to speak with our experienced SX consultant, Random Bartending Millennial, who offered us the following words of wisdom.

“As a local, you’ll need money. If you can’t leave, find a temp job and make as much money as possible. Bartender, sound technician, and security are all pretty easy gigs to get into. If you try and do everything you’ll miss out on a lot. If you’re not working find a place on the east side, camp out, and people watch.”

 Normally we’d say “see you there” but let’s be honest, we won’t. – Jack Anderson

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